A Two-Headed Montag Monster.....and Heidi's Mom is Suddenly the New Dina Lohan

I couldn't decide on what to title this post so I combined them. I own this crap. I get to decide. Anyhills, my worst nightmare has come true (Siamese Montag sisters) at the same time my dream has come true (Darlene Montag is totally the new Dina Lohan!). It's almost like Hills implosion for me. Heidi Montag, her more than likely douche-bag sister Holly Montag, her MILFless mother, Darlene, and Steve Sanders were all teeth and fake blond hair while they had a little dinner at STK in LA the other night.

I tell ya, a little lighting from below the face really takes years off. With the camera lights on Darlene looks like 25 year old. When the camera lights fade, Darlene is looking more like her horse that lives at Crested Butte. I miss that damn horse.

I know I said the other day that Holly Montag looked gross, but these pictures make me feel differently. I'm confused. I'm in Montag turmoil. At least you can always count on Heidi to be a complete fright-fest. And Steve Sanders with that extra shiny black shirt? Looks like someone raided Darlene's closet before they went out. And is that a new perm I see, Spencer? Seems like setting it in rollers the night before is really doing the trick.

6 more sleeps until The Hills is back on!

www.myspace.com/ImBringingBloggingBack

real cool art 0 Comments | Readmore...

Meet Holly Montag, No Really.

Hi everyone! Meet Holly Montag/Montard. She's the sister of Heidi Montard. She enjoys big white teeth that are a bit bucky beaver and sandals that lace up around her cankles. Holly also enjoys such activities as filming new scenes of The Hills with Lauren Conrad and never eating the sandwich that's in front of her. Wanna date her? Well you better hurry up because she is relatively unknown right now, but come the end of August she will sadly be an overnight household name as she is set to appear in a few crapisodes of The Hills. Seriously, it's like huge white teeth are a requirement for The Hills.

I'm looking forward to seeing Holly, I must admit. It's going to be a nice reminder of what Heidi used to look like before all the plastic surgeries. Holly is totally looking like her mom, Darlene. I hope someone is left in Crested Butte to take care of that damn horse. I say put it to sleep, but that's just me.

www.myspace.com/ImBringingBloggingBack

real cool art 0 Comments | Readmore...